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Trust Is In The Air

First impressions are everything when it comes to dating but how much of the conversation are you willing to believe in? Half of the population of American who do have the opportunity to date will say that 20 percent of Americans trust in the word of their date. For this reason, maybe because the date had a rough time in the last relationship and really don’t want to open up as much until he or she sees that the person in which they are dating are really being truthful.

This person may or may not be the best to date. It is up to the person to decide whether he or she wants to date this particular person. If you find that this person is unusually quiet, take a second look at what his or her circumstances are. There is a possibility that something was wrong on the job, or family problems and he or she probably thought that getting out was a good idea.

Don’t take everything a person says at face value because some of the information you receive may not be true. But in order to find out if the person is trustworthy, he or she will not tell you that he or she loves you two months into the two of you dating. That is a sure sign that what is being said you must take it with a grain of salt. If you find yourself liking him or her, take a second thought about what you are getting yourself into.

Enjoy your time with this person and watch out for signs regarding the trust factor. If he or she claims that he or she is working late, this usually means that he or she is interested in someone else or seeing someone else if he or she hasn’t come right out and say that he or she are dating other people. Make it clear and plain that you are just dating with the huge factor that dating means meeting up to see if you are compatible with one another. Don’t take things to heart until you are dating after a year and even then, leave the trust up in the air where it belongs.

For questions and comments please email me at bludiamond@enterto.com

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What Good Would Your Words Do?

What if you date someone who is always so down in the dumps that you can’t pull them out of it? It would not be worth your time and breathe to still try to date this particular person because that kind of energy can rub off on you and it would be best to part as friends.

It would be difficult to do because in the beginning, you may not see it because first impression are the foundation of what helps a person to decide whether they want to continue to see that person. You start to see a change in that person after such a time passes; you have dated the “poor me” person. This person wants someone else to feel some kind of sympathy for them in order to feel that closeness that they may have missed growing up.

It will hardly ever be “me against the world” type of mentality. They are so down because of things around them that they cannot change and do not know how to get out of this blue funk. You are now considered to be that backbone for them until he or she finds someone else that catches their attention. This is when you have to realize what type of person he or she will be to you in your life. A season, a reason, or a lifetime. You tend to look at a person who is a season to be a lifetime and once this “season” is in your life in your mind as your lifetime, your real lifetime will pass you by. The season who is always down will change your world tremendously by becoming dependant on you for emotional support and you will be there and then you will have nothing left for yourself.

You find yourself drained from continuing to tell your season/lifetime how things will get better and with you sticking by him or her, you tend to resent him or her but still have a continuous love for them because you have gotten to the point where you do not want to see this person hurt. They will cling more to you in order to feel also protected from whatever is hurting them or the fear of being hurt. You want to not have to burn bridges when there may come a time where you will need this person as well. You will have to meditate on whether this person is your season, reason or lifetime. And when you realize that the season you thought was your lifetime is not your lifetime, you have to make yourself understand your own words.

For questions and comments please email me at bludiamond@enterto.com

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Saying Yes To A New Beginning

This is your time to shine. You have the be the brightest star in your date’s eyes. You do not have to do too much to get their attention--just be yourself. Each year or two a person goes through the lows of a breakup and at times it is difficult to date, but if you find yourself in a position to love yourself first within the first few months of each new year, you’ll find that you will attract positive people in your life.

If you have had bad luck in finding a date think on the positives in your life and bring them out of you to show outwardly and through that people will see the enter beauty that you do have. Work on your negatives to turn them into positives. You can still date in the process of working on your negatives. Yoga helps in this instants; this guides you to having a well rounded mind and look at yourself and realizing that you are not perfect and no one is.

If you have more negatives than positives, build more on your Yoga classes or take an anger management class. The best type of love is loving yourself. It is much getting used to but each morning that you wake up breathe and look and yourself in the mirror and say, “I love everything about me.” Because the day will be about the things that you do and the things you are capable of accomplishing for that day; it’s not just about you. Because when a person sees that in you, they will get the understanding that you are not all about yourself and that they may have room in your life for them. So pushing out the poisons in your life whether it be ex loves and bad relationships will get you started in the direction of new beginnings, especially on dates.

For questions and comments please email me at bludiamond@enterto.com

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Total Supremacy

You act like you are on top of the world but in reality something is wrong with that picture. You could be lonely, no husband or wife or not even have children. It truly is okay that you don’t have these things. As long as you can go out and enjoy what life has to offer you in a good way. You do not have to sit around the house and be sad all the time. You can be sad for a while, but move on. Misery loves company and you have to know how to get rid of misery when it has stayed too long.

If you feel like you can’t get a date, look in the mirror and find out what it is you need to change about yourself. You may feel like you do not need to change anything about yourself. Ask yourself, when was the last time you went out on a date? Do you know the reason why another date didn’t happen? If you know the answers to these questions then it’s time to start with YOU. You do not need an expensive expert to give you a make over. You can go out and pick out the right outfits that suits your body type and makeup that works with your complexion.

You do however may have to take a course in table manners or etiquette. Find a good friend who knows the rules in dating and what questions to ask and not to ask. Know within yourself that you have total control over the situation and when a date doesn’t go well, don’t lose control. Just be happy that you went out on a date and move on to the next one. I can’t stress it enough--just enjoy your time while you have it.

The date you have may feel a bit intimidated if you are a well rounded, exciting and well known person in your community. Not showing off too much will have the person you date enjoy your company and you are able to enjoy a night on the town.

For questions and comments please email me at bludiamond@enterto.com

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Pop Off

So you have a good looking man or woman on your arm when you go out. You cannot get mad or jealous over someone who looks at who you’re with. In all reality, you should be pleased at the fact that you do have a good looking person on your arm. That shows that this person chose you to go out with them. Don’t get all angry and mad because someone spoke to whom you are with. Smile and sit back. Don’t ask questions because if this is your first date with them, this is not your place to ask. That person will tell you if he or she feels the need to.

You know that this is your time with this person and all their attention should be on you. Don’t make a scene as if the attention should be on you. That would seem childish on your part and you will not be asked out again. You cannot let every little thing get to you while you are out on this date. A date is a time to enjoy yourself. If you are riding wit the person do not complain about how the person is driving. Make conversation wit the person to get your mind off of his or her driving habits.

If you go out to eat, if the food is not to your liking, tell the waiter or waitress what you do not like about it but be cordial at all cost. Also have some decent table manners. Don’t put your elbows on the table while you eat, do not slurp your food, and bring the food to your mouth; not mouth to food. If you date pays any attention to how you are eating don’t ask, “What are you looking at?” Have some dignity about yourself.

Your date should also not provoke you to get angry unless you are just the type of person who gets angry with every little word spoke to you. Save the drama for another time. If the date is not feeling you or the other way around, you should say so and part ways before continuing with that date. Since you are together for that evening, make the best of it and say your good nights after the date ends.

For questions and comments please email me at bludiamond@enterto.com

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Expiration Date

When you are on a date you want to received the best time out of the date. You want to at least have the same things in common to see if you mesh well and also see if you would like to see that person again. Treat a date like you were going grocery shopping.

For those of you who go grocery shopping, you make sure what you receive or picked is fresh and desirable enough to take home. You stroll down the isle looking for the perfect product and study it until you feel this is the product you really want. On a date you observe the date that you are on and you never go over the time of the date or you will become tired or bored wit the date. Coffee is different because having coffee together should only last 15 to 30 minutes.

Lunch, especially on a job should last 30 minutes to an hour. That is lunch during the time you are working. No job will give you a lunch break no longer than that. Lunch basically is a time where you can really get the information needed to decide whether you want to go out with this person. Go down the grocery isle again and compare lunch to your date. What lunch meat do your normally crave if your date reminds you of it. If you are not too crazy about lunch meat then move on to the next thing that you would consider lunch.

If you missed breakfast and breakfast is the most important meal of the day you can have brunch with your significant date of your choice. This also has a time limit. No time is really a good time so make the best of that time with that person. What would you eat at brunch that is to your liking with the date that you are having? Whatever it is, make it exciting and fulfilling. This way, the brunch ca n hold you over until dinner time.

For those of you who are on a diet you will have to watch what you eat. Same goes with who you take out on a date. Watch who you desire to be with on a diet. Some things may be good for you or some things may be bad for you. What looks good is not always good for you. So choose wisely when you back away from seeing what is good. Diner is the best conversation time because you are both talking about what has gone on throughout the day. You may find what he or she has to say quite interesting. Just as long as you don’t get caught up in the conversation and forget what time it is. Don’t let time run out on you or the date will just spoil your evening.

For questions and comments please email me at bludiamond@enterto.com

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When Push Comes To Shove

It is always good to listen to your date when trying to make a good impression especially if you are meeting in a club. A man will see a beautiful woman and send her a drink and introduce himself as saying things like, “You must have had a rough day because you are sitting here alone non approachable. “ Or asking questions when the lady clearly has stated that she doesn’t desire to be bothered.

She may have on a pair of what looks like reading glasses with no book, hair pinned in an up do looking like a teacher and dressed as if she is not out to impressed anyone. Then you sit and carry on a conversation totally different from the last man and speak in a way to catch her attention without asking questions but, studying her actions and mannerisms. Then politely give your name and excuse yourself. First dates will consist of space if you decide to go some place in which will require space.

When something catches her eye you then say a small bit to invite her into your space. This way after the date you can easily have something to talk about. Pay attention to what she says. Focus on what she says and not what she says it with. Don’t let your eye wonder to her mouth or below the neckline because if this does, your mind will wonder what her kisses will be like. At the end of the night, the kiss will tell it all.

The kiss will indicate if you will be in her life as a friend or if you will be in her life as her future. If she fidgets with her keys at the door, she is waiting for you to kiss her. If she quickly puts the keys in the door and says good night, you have just made a bad impression with her on the date. Never go 100 percent; you give your 90 percent and let her go the other 10 percent. Finding the right one does not take lies, it takes some what of an embellishment of self to get passed the first night. After that you are on your own once you have been guided what to do.

For questions and comments please email me at bludiamond@enterto.com

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Everything Is Done Whose Way?

You find the perfect date for you and this perfect date really turns out to be another disaster because the date orders everything for you. This my be the second sign or third sign to let you know how controlling this person can be. The first initial meeting, you will not be able to tell how controlling he or she is because they hide that part of themselves until they get to know you better. Control issues stems back to childhood when a parent may constantly tell him or her to do something the child doesn’t want to do. As the child becomes older is caries over into adulthood.

If the date did not ask you what you want to order and assumes that this is what you like this is one sign of being in control. Or it can just possibly be mean that the person who is going to pay may not have enough money to get what you really want to eat. That is why it is always good to have your own money on a date. You can be polite and say that you do not want what the person has ordered for you, that you want what you like on the menu, and then reassure your date that you have your own. Be polite about it and not snobbishly and look into his or her eyes when saying it to read his or hers eyes because some dates may get the impression that since you do this that you may just have money all the time and they will try to get a date with you the next time.

You may never compromise on what movie to go see because your date may like certain type of movies and you really will not enjoy yourself on a date if you are not willing to see what this other person wants to see. And if you decide to see the movie with him or her suggest that the movie you desire to see they come back and see that one as well. But if your date says no, then cancel the date or politely ask for a rain check. This is usually done over the phone.

Doing fun this will also be difficult to achieve if the person doesn’t want to do anything fun like skating or strolling through the park. There comes a time in every person’s life when enough is enough and you have to come to your senses and think this person is never going to change and you can not change him or her. It can be also about status. If the person you are dating makes more money than you, there will be a slight control issue and the subject will continually be brought up to make you feel less that you are and you know you deserve better than that. Then you do have those with money who like to share their wealth who are not controlling.

Everything has to be right in their perfect little world and if you are not a part of the equation, you must move on. There are better things to do with your time.

For questions and comments please email me at bludiamond@enterto.com

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Messed Up

You are being taken out several times with whom you think is a perfect gentleman and then the tables turn on you. He doesn’t tell you how beautiful you are, send you flowers, take you for granted, while he is out doing what he wants to do and expects you to be waiting on you when he gets home. There are times when you have to put your foot down letting him (or her) know that you have your own thing and you will not hold on much longer.

It’s strange how things can turn around to the point where after dating , people become too comfortable in their own skin and avoid the responsibility of being in a relationship. How you attracted that person should be used to also keep the person you are seeing. And within the relationship, make it exciting enough to keep the fires burning. Soon if you don’t keep doing what you were doing at first that person you were with show you they don’t need you. They will start to think you were a winner then later become a loser.

The person will soon become dead weight to you because you start feeding lines to the one who thought was the perfect person for you. Then you sit and ponder that you really messed up somewhere and you try to figure out where you went wrong. It probably will never come to you. Staying out late night, coming in early in the morning, and making excuses to money spent somewhere else. With these excuses your loved one will get sick and tired of the loose rap. Then when you are out together, you begin to get jealous because your mate is getting attention that you were not giving to him or her. You have to come better than that.

The best thing is to take it back to where you begin with that person and try not to make it look like you are trying so hard with it. Start with a simple dinner at home and candlelight. It will be a start and take it one day at a time; and if in all reality, the person who has your heart will forget that you once messed up. Maybe you’ll be able to clean up your act.

For questions and comments please email me at bludiamond@enterto.com

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He Said She Said

You have just been fixed up on a blind date and your friend has spoken highly of you to your blind date and vice versa. Friends continue to talk until the two of you meet. This back and forth ping pong conversation goes on for quite some time until you two decide to meet each other. The friend set up the meeting because numbers were not given out. Of course, this is a blind date.

You meet at the designated place hoping to find the man or woman of your dreams. Both of you are on time for the date and give each other a polite greeting. This man seems to be a perfect gentleman because he has pulled out the chair for you. First impressions can sometimes be false but, play along if you will because the evening has started out perfectly for you. The young lady gives you decent eye contact and you feel comfortable with the fact that she is doing this. This technique shows that she is paying attention to you.

Everything your friend has said about the blind date is true so far but, you never mention to your date what your friend has said about them. The evening was a blast and you go home to tell you friend how the date went. In your mind, do you think there would be a second or third date? Depending on how well the other person felt after the date. How much more should the friend stay involved after the first initial date? If the date goes well, your friend has done their part in setting you up on a blind date. It is entirely up to you and your blind date whether you should continue.

If your friend continues to ask questions on what you are going to do if the date goes as planned, tell them thank you for being a friend and you appreciate them trying to set you up on dates but, you feel that you can handle the situation at this point and that there could be a possible double date. Too much talk will get your friend involved and a friend should not be involved all the time.

For questions and comments please email me at bludiamond@enterto.com

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Midnight Hour

You work hard all day at the office and then have to come home and clean house. You deserve the best life has to offer but, there is no one around to share the special moments with you. So on the weekends you do not have to work, you get all dolled up and go out. First thing, you must decide what to wear and then decide where to go. Where the girls and boys are. (men and women). The perfect place and the perfect time. You didn’t know about this but, you have just been invited to a gala event by a friend. Men and women always have friends to associate with.

The time has come to attend this special event. You get there late. Not intentional. You want to look your best. You walk in and every heard turn. It is a great feeling when you are the center of attention. After your nerves calm down, you mingle a bit with others and your friends. As the night prolongs you feel that coming out could have been a waste of time. As you are about to leave you are approach by the most popular person there. This person is the one who throws the event. As always it will be a friend of a friend who has given out your address.

You like the conversation between the two of you but you can’t stay long because you have to work in the morning. This person has taken a liking to you so he or she gives you their card to call. You go home starry eyed thinking about the person you just met and your day at work goes well. Do not be in a rush to call him or her because this will make you look like you are anxious. Wait at least three days before calling and ask if this person would like to go for coffee. Tea if they do not drink coffee. Discussing life over coffee is a beautiful thing. Schedule yourself for coffee if there is no time during the morning hours or day to get together.

This may lead to something big if you both have something in common. It is very important to see what each has to say about certain topics. The beauty of a date is the way a person smiles when thy see you and how much they enjoy your company when they are around. Not every situation works out that way; not every prince charming will cross your path but you will be able to not feel so lonely at night.

For questions and comments please email me at bludiamond@enterto.com

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Scream Louder

Each week you go out on dates to find that special someone and it seems that each one of those dates ended disastrous. You start think, “Well what’s wrong with me?” There is nothing wrong with you. You may be attracting those in which you see yourself in their eyes. When you figure out what it is in why you are attracting this type of people, you may need to change the way you dress, smile, walk or speech.

When you know you have had a bad date, what do you do when you close the door to your apartment or home? Do you take a deep breath, lean against the door for a few seconds and then move around or have you ever just screamed because you are tired of running into the same type every time you go out? If you haven’t done the latter, it is time to do that depending on how many dates you have in a week or month and neither one turns out the way you expect it to.

Sit down and evaluate what you could do differently in order to attract that person you have your eye on. Even if you don’t have your eye one anyone just carrying yourself in a certain way attract someone. First step is to dress according to your best assets but, don’t overdue it. For those who have nice legs, where a skirt that will show them. Be lady like with he skirt though; do not have the skirt too short. You desire to leave a little bit of an imagination. If your hips are your best asset, wear jeans the fit and are comfortable not tight fitting jeans.

If you feel that your top part is your best assets, wear something sensual not so revealing that men are just focused on that only. Men are different when if comes to attracting the opposite sex. You know that you cannot walk around all the time with your shirt off. Wear a shirt and pants that compliments you, your skin tone and your body type. Men have it easy because they do not require much work. A shower, shave and colon is all that it takes for a man to look his best. Not to mention clean teeth.

Sooner or later you will find that one person you have attracted, date like you really want to and then you can really scream louder. In the meantime, enjoy time with yourself and have fun.

For questions and comments please email me at bludiamond@enterto.com

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Taking It To The Streets

For once on your life take a walk to see how many people you can meet and observe what kind of reaction you get from them. No matter what time of the day, month or season it is, you can always find someone who is interested enough in you to go out on a date. Don’t just hand out your number to a total stranger. Walk down the street with a smile on your face as if nothing is bothering you. When you smile others smile with you.

Nine times out of ten you’ll hear people say that they most attractive thing on a person is their smile. Smiling can brighten up anyone’s day. Walk as if you are going to the candy store purchasing your favorite candy. Along the way, someone may notice your smile and stop to ask you why are you smiling? This is a good way to break the ice with someone whom you may end up with on a date. Stand there and have a decent conversation, do not exchange numbers, just agree to meet and the same place and go from there. Then, you can exchange numbers when the two of you meet up again.

Set up date nights, make flyers and pass them out. This will be another opportunity to participate in finding the perfect one for you at the event. Events like this can last as long as you desire it to be because you are the one in control of the party. Make the time early enough to end at a time where the people will not tire themselves out. That should give the people enough time to get around to everyone in the room. A smile on your face does go a very long way. People remember smiling faces.

Go to the park--jog or sit on the bench feeding the birds. Continue to smile as people walk by. It is also good to get fresh air. Fresh air clear your head from being inside all day and there is a need for getting out. People enjoying the night life and at some point that has to end unless you are a celebrity and it is granted that you have to be out just to be seen.

Get on the basketball court. People love to stop by and watch the guys play basketball even if they are not familiar with the game. There might even be a single man out on the court who has caught your eye. That would be a wonderful feeling if he caught you looking his way. He might just walk over to you and say hello. Still. . .continue to smile.

Have a block party and tell your friends to invite their friends. Out of each friend’s friend, there is a guy or a girl waiting in the wings just to be seen. Plenty of food and drinks to go around and keep the party interesting. You can also have a meet and greet for those who do not know each other. It will be up to them to make that first move in getting to know one another. Remember to smile.

For questions and comments please email me at bludiamond@enterto.com

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Tis The Season

Of all the times to fall in love this would be the time to do it only if you go out to every place possible and be seen by the person you desire to attract. Granted it is not as simple as it sounds because during the holidays, people tend to concentrate on purchasing gifts for their loved ones (i.e. children, spouses, other relatives) but think of those who do not have any one to share that special time with. Many holiday seasons have gone by and no one knows of a person who doesn’t have anyone to share their lives with.

Single and still dating? Enjoy doing that because you have the freedom to pick and choose. You don’t have to tie yourself down to one person if you are not ready to find that one true love. This season is the most exciting time because if you plan on going to an office Christmas party, there are rules and regulations to how to carry yourself at a Christmas party. Not to say that you have to be a wall flower or stiff, just control your alcohol intake because office people will talk and you’ll never live it down.

This is the time where the person in the office who has had their eye on you can now approach you and ask you out on a date. There is laughter and mistletoe. The person who is interested in you will do his or her best to get you under the mistletoe to steal a kiss. And maybe the kiss will lead to a starting date and many more dates. This maybe be the person takes your breath away and you probably had your eye on him or her too. This is the time where you can have your most fun and not take everything so serious but, remembering the real meaning of the holidays.

For those who are not feeling the dating scene quite yet, the season will come as a depressing time for you. Do your best not to let it get that way by renting movies and if you have very good friends, have a little gathering at your place on certain nights before the holidays or even on that day. Make sure that you will have enough entertainment to keep the festivities enjoyable. If you have no time for parties, your work will become the most important thing. If your job gives you time off for the holidays, plan on going out of town to keep from feeling so alone. If not to your families home go some place you have never been before. Ahhhh! New faces.

In several cities some people organize a night for speed dating. That’s when singles get together and have a limited time to get to know each other and see which one is compatible and will be matched. You really can meet a lot of people with a dating scene like that. Whatever you flavor is for the holidays just make it fun and safe because there is always next year.

For questions and comments please email me at bludiamond@enterto.com

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Alpha Dog

If you have a tick on you get it off your back because that is the most irritating thing to have when you are trying to do other things. When it comes to finding that right person who can fit into your daily routine then you nay have something to gain. For that special someone that you just met and really don’t know how to tell them how good they are, you really haven’t gotten to know them that well yet.

Your habits can be better than or worse than their habits. It is not so much that you have to know where they are going every other night; that will be wanting too much control. You will quickly get on their nerves because of asking too many questions. Show them in a more gentler way how you feel without scaring them away. During the dating process find out as much as you possibly can about them without being too obvious. There may be a second date.

The person is an important person in the community and he or she has taken you out or invited you to dinner. This is the most exciting thing that can ever happen to a person. You were just minding your on business, plus being in the right place at the right time. They may be into themselves. People like that are usually hard to reach, but still have hearts and desire love too. They feel they would rather have someone in their lives equal to what they have accomplished.

Continuing to be number one on their own list and they desire to have the same as friends. Granted, they are interesting to be around and for you to be a part of that is a great thing even if it only last for a little while. Some can be dangerous but you’ll never know unless they trust enough to get involved. They are as sweet as they desire to be and will go all out for you.

Enjoy the time well spent and in passing if things do not work out, there are always special occasions you can remind him or her of.

For questions and comments please email me at bludiamond@enterto.com

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Is It Scary?

Dating is a situation where two people meet at an agreed place to have fun. You can take in a movie or go out to eat. Whatever your desired place is, that’s where you two can decide to go. Upon meeting this person you prepare to look your best. Once there at the meeting place, if you are the first to arrive, observe where you are before going any further. If you are a few minutes late and you don’t know what your date looks like but, describes what he or she is wearing, you can make a decision to turn around or continue with the date.

Take a deep breath, walk in and sit down with a smile. Get to know the person as much as you possibly can for the time spent on the date. You have already exchanged phone numbers so you do not have to worry about whether he or she will call you. If in fact you drove your own vehicle or taken public transportation, your date doesn’t have to drive you home. Neither insist that he or she does. But what if the person you just spent a wonderful evening with starts checking up on you, and you didn’t even give him or her directions to your home? Stalker potential. The person has become obsessed with you overnight and you don’t even known it.

At what point do you realize that the person is a stalker or has stalker tendencies? There is no real time to tell if he or she is. If you have good neighbors who stay up at night, are considered a bit nosey, they will be the first to tell you that someone has been sneaking around your yard at night. You begin to pay close attention to sounds at night. The best way to become much safer is to purchase security lights and an alarm system. It is always good if the neighbor you live in has a “neighborhood watch” group.

When you are told that this person has been snooping around on the premises, and calls at a later time, be cordial to the person, not letting on that you know that this person has been coming to your home unannounced. Contact the authorities and explain what has been going on. In most cases, the person that likes you could not be a stalker and just really wants to get to know you but, it is not necessary to hide in the bushes if you want to get to know someone. Some people have a generous heart and feel bad for contacting the authorities but, it has to be done.

No one should jeopardize your sleeping patterns over a simple date that may not ever happen again. There is no way of knowing what a person is like until you get to know him or her. As mentioned, never give out your personal information. When going home from the date, make sure that you are not being followed. You are safer by taking public transportation if you have it close in your area. The information still can be found if the person has access to a computer. All that is needed is a name and age. Each date can be very thought provoking but, if you want to have fun, don’t spend too much time thinking about if the person is a potential stalker. He or she could look like anyone.

For questions and comments email me at bludiamond@enterto.com

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Super Fly Sister/Brother

Like an obsession, you want to be around this person all the time. The first meeting, this person found you, but you become so overwhelmed that this person chose to talk to you that you just don’t know how to act. Okay, so you make it home from an evening out and the person is perfect in every way imaginable. Meaning there was no conversation of a night cap, a kiss good night, or lingering around the door trying to find the right words to say good night.

This doesn’t mean that this person wasn’t interested. It only means that this person is a respectable person until he or she gets to know you; then things may change. You have a wonderful night and feel like a child at Christmas time. You go to bed early so that gingerbread cookies dance through your head in hopes that you will see him or her again. You must be careful not to get to excited about this person. It is understandable that it makes you feel good to get into the dating game again possibly after not dating for so long.

You wonder what is it about this person that makes your soul quiver and your knees ache. It will never come to you what it is about this person that you like so much. It could be the way he or she walks, talks, smile or dresses. Don’t be fooled by imitation. Going out on dates, people dress to impress and once they get to know you, if there is a second or third date, they begin to feel more comfortable in their skin, and start going on dates dressed any kind of way with you.

The clean cut person is serious about his or her life and knows exactly what he or she wants out of life. The person is very articulate and well defined in manner. To some, even the sloppiest of dressers are super fly. In the early 70’s, super fly was intended to be for someone who dressed in the finest of clothes and spoke a certain language just to get their point across. Super fly nowadays have come up. Although still wearing the latest fashion the vocabulary has changed. Once you catch a super fly on your arm, you will be apt to not let that person get away.

These are the extremely fun people. They also know the latest happenings and know how to stay out of trouble because they don’t get into any. The super fly type are somewhat low key and want you around when they want you around. They take care of business when they have to, and knows when to say “no.” Two super fly people put together are a huge pair or if one is not super fly and the other is, the one that isn’t will be made into one. Any one person can be super fly in your eyes. It all depends on how you look at it. Huggie Bear, Sweet Daddy and Cleopatra Jones are the super flyers just to name a few. Someone in your space can be super fly to you.

For questions and comments please write to bludiamond@enterto.com

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Perfect Combination

You have met this person who makes your heart skip a beat and you feel like at times the whole world has stopped on its axis just so that you two can enjoy that moment together. Far be it that the sparks will fly and you feel like this Is the person you desire to spend the rest of your life with. Pump your breaks. . .take a look at this person again. You must first see If you two have the same ideal interests. This may be the hardest thing to come by because a few will say they like the same things you do.

Read between the lines if you can, but as mentioned before DO NOT analyze too much. The conversation goes as such:

YOU: I like going for walks on the beach

HIM: You too?! I find it to be the most relaxing thing a person can ever do when it’s a beautiful night out

Translation: Let us take a drive down to the coast so that I can get to really know you.

But the person could really like doing those things and have good intensions. If a person is into you, the feeling will be so deep that the fire that burns within their hearts cannot be contained, and they want to spend every waking moment with you. If you are the type that do not mind a little bit of pampering, then this person is for you. Some people don’t know how to take that if they are not too affectionate.

YOU: My shoulders hurt

HIM: Do you mind if I give you a massage? I’m good with my hands

YOU: No thank you I can manage

He’s thinking at this particular time that you have just crushed his ego because all he wants to do is get close to you. There is nothing wrong with that but there is a limit. So instead of a massage (not good on a first date) just cuddle. That’s the type of intimacy a few admire in a woman or a man. These are the one who know what boundaries are. Once you get to know each other and spend that quality time together, it becomes surreal that you are finishing each other’s sentences.

Anything that comes along that may make the relationship difficult to handle, you sit down with each other as adults and work things out without arguing over what someone else has said, or what was heard by someone else. That ruins a relationship when there is a confrontation and no one in the relationship doesn’t want to listen, and they want to believe what is being said about them. When you come to an understanding and agree to not let anyone hinder from dating whom you desire to date, it is the person you are dating whom you need to deal with. Because in the end you are the one having to deal with the person you are dating. When other people see you happy, they seem to always try to find a way to break up the happiness because they are not happy themselves.

A perfect combination is when two things or people fit together like two peas in a pod, a stamp to an envelope and birds to a feather. Find which one you are.

For comments and questions please email me at bludiamond@enterto.com

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Around The Way

What type of person do you want in your life when it comes to dating? Some prefer the business type of person in which they are always serious, business minded, elegant and somewhat stiff. Not all business types are stiff. They all know how to have their fun. Their fun may consist of a well expensive paid vacation because they can afford it. Other business type people are those who worked hard to get to where they desire to be but never forget where they came from, but enjoys the finer things in life because they might have had the finer things when growing up.

Or do you prefer the “Around the way” person? The one who dresses in the coolest fashion or has knowledge of a little street slang. The good looking ones that really likes to have fun no matter what others think about you when you are going someplace. They smile with sense of confidence as if they know they either have someone good on their arm, and getting ahead in life. The confidence of one can generate through someone else. If someone doesn’t tell you how good you look then guaranteed someone else will.

This person may have a way of talking that catches your attention or maybe the casual way he or she walks. An “around the way” person can break hearts or act tender and surrender to others advances without breaking their stride, and know exactly what to say or do. When they are in a situation where the person they are with knows how to react to certain situations and remain dignified, but letting the person know what is on their minds. These people are very independent. Around the way people do not let other people hinder them in getting what they want in life, especially dating.

They like to look good and want the ones on their arm to look just as good. The hair has to be right, clothes neatly pressed, and in the summertime, it’s all about the fun of things. In their neighborhood they are considered jewels and the opposite sex will definitely do their best to try and talk to them. Their favorite place to hang out will be the movies (if you are female) and hanging out with your girls. And for the men it’s usually dealing in some type of sport while everyone in business suits are try to “push up” on you. They all loved to be whined and dined. If not a love connection, you’ll have a friend.

For questions and comments please email bludiamond@enterto.com

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Tears Of A Clown

It is true what they say about nice guys finishing last. These nice guys are usually the ones who are not eye candy but have a decent heart. Same for a few women. How do they compensate for not being able to attract the person whom they are interested in? They have lives so if they work, their work is more important than trying to find a date. If they are wanting to date, there are the personals ads that they can look into or learn to wait and be content with themselves.

First, instead of dreading to be alone, find something that completes you. No man or woman can complete you until you complete yourself. Do things that you have always dreamed of doing and make it a goal to do it. You will find yourself being more fulfilled in your days when you accomplish what you set out to do. What is it that you have always wanted to do? As mentioned in earlier articles, do your research. Find out what it takes to get what you desire.

If your heart is set on finding that special someone, then find a spa in which you can afford, get pampered, purchase an outfit and have a date with yourself because once you have been pampered for that day, you’ll be feeling too good to share that experience with anybody else. Take a class. This will get you started in the right direction in what your goals are. You may even meet someone inn your class. Going to the grocery store in the middle of the night has become so cliché. Fix the hair, brighten that smile and hold your beautiful head up. As also mentioned, you are as beautiful as anyone else walking around. You have a right to acquire happiness.

You waste time moping around feeling sorry for yourself when there is a whole world for you to explore and enjoy. Dating is a part of it. If no one can see your worth then they are not worth your time because you are more precious than jewels and will become the apple of someone’s eye eventually. It is all about timing. Time for the single ones who haven’t found the right one for them to come out of the circus tent and live the life you are expected to live.

For questions and comments please email me at bludiamond@enterto.com

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Movers And Shakers

Do you ever feel that you are in the right place at the right time, or the wrong place at the wrong time, the wrong place at the right time or the right place at the wrong time? Either way you phrase it, you always seem to run into someone that takes your breath away. You smile, flirt, walk by to see if your eyes will meet. When they do it's simple "Hello" added with another noticeable smile.

A few times then you play this game of walking by and glancing at each other until one of you decide to make a move. What if you find out that the person you run into is well known around town? We are not talking playboy or playgirl, we are talking well known in the community where he or she is doing good in the community. This person is attracted to you. WOW! Okay now, play it cool. So why haven't you seen that person before? You don't get out much do you? You'll will have to learn to deal with the fact that he or she is a very important person especially if he catches your attention. (i.e. Mr. Bigg and Carrie) All Carrie knew was that this man took her breath away.

If you want to be a part of that society, enjoy it. Sit down with the mover and shaker (because this is what that person does-always busy and may have some time for you.) and discuss the importance of dating to him or her and if that person will really have that time to spend. If that person is really interested in you, he or she will make that time. That person may even invite you along to whatever he or she feel is important to them so that time can be well spent. if you are already used to hanging with that type of crowd, you'll fit right in.

No person is too good of a person to spend that quality time with you because you are just as special as they are. The only difference could be that the person you are dating is of a higher authority than you, but you can't be intimidated by it. The world keeps turning and all you have to do is turn with it.

For questions and comments please email me at bludiamond@enterto.com

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Playing Tag

The calling got out of hand and you have decided to give it another shot at trying to contact the person whom you are interested in. And how long should you continue to try and contact this person in order to get a date? The decision once again is entirely up to you depending on how well you are into this person. If you find yourself going in circles with this person that you just can't seem to get a hold of, then it's definitely time to move on to the next person.

The two of you could possibly be busy and can't seem to find the time to plan the date. What to do in this case is to compare each other's calendars if in fact you finally catch up to one another. If in fact you are tired of playing phone tag, decide to go out on a date with someone else, and then that person calls, be grown about the situation by stating that you didn't mean to waste any of that person's time by constantly calling, but that you really had an interest in that person. Key word "had," maybe they'll get the hint that you have made your decision not to bother them any more.

Once the calls stop, the other person may take the initiative and start calling back. Not giving the person the cold shoulder, but being polite is the best policy in saying that you are busy with other things and you hope that the person understands, and do your best to remain friends. Also let the person know that it was good speaking with them from time to time. Hopefully, you'll not have run across a person who is too persistent in wanting to have that date with you.

Dating is difficult and we all have to pick out who is best for us but always keep in mind that it is what it is. . .fun. Dating can also be a scary thing, but that shouldn't let that intimidate you because of one bad date. Just like playing a game; you run around to see who you can catch while the other person dodges to get away from the contact. Once you get tired of trying to catch up to the person, you move on to the next one to see if you can catch that person. You never know, you might just be quick enough to catch the one who really is interested in you.

For questions and comments please email me at bludiamond@enterto.com

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Workaholics

You've worked at a job for a year and a half. Someone in the office has their eye on you, and finally decides to approach you. You are flattered that this person has come to you in a manner that is very polite. You decide to meet on the weekend when you are off work. Some work policies don't allow co-workers to date.

If a person is in another part of the building on the same job, it should be okay to pass the time with a date. The reason for the non dating policy rule is because the personal life of the two will show in the job performance. The performance might be good and it might be bad. It depends on how the person affects your life. When you start dating the person that is somewhere in the building, some people have to keep it a secret. Some are so excited to date and fall in love that they cannot contain their happiness. It is your choice to keep it a secret or tell it.

You both will have to sit down and decide what to do about the situation. You don't want to be talked about behind your back because of a dating situation. Then if you decide to continue to date, and it becomes serious, one of you might have to leave your position but make sure that when you start to date, you have a plan to find another position even though you love the place where you work. The relationship could be worth the nights you spend in the office.

For questions and comments please email me at bludiamond@enterto.com

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Burn Out

Just like your favorite foods that you eat every other day and the taste of your favorite drink you drink constantly, a person can get burned out on any little thing they love. Dating is the same way when a person is looking for something that is hard to find. What if every date was the same? Yes, that would be boring wouldn't it.

As I have mentioned before, do something to spice up the date. Instead of going to dinner and a movie, why not take a drive to see the countryside? Or for a walk in the park? These are included in the "no money to spend" policy. And you might just be tired of dating for a while. If so, then it was also mentioned that you should take time out for yourself if you desire to not date for a while. Searching for a date or true love is like searching for a job. You are pounding the payment possibly every other day (in this case-dating) and night. The singles area in the newspaper or even online which does take up much time in filling out the form needed to make a match.

Once several matches are made, you must pick and choose whom you like or think you would be compatible with. That becomes a drag most of the time and you have to stop and take a breather just to collect your thoughts and start over. Same with a job. With so much going, you do get burned out on just looking.

(1) Step back and take a look at your prospects

(2) Find what looks good or sounds decent

(3) Take a chance

(4) Enjoy your time with that prospect

(5) Your time alone is precious; enjoy you

(6) Read a good book

(7) Do things with yourself

(8) Cook

(9) Take up a class

(10) Remain busy

The bottom line to not being burned out on dating is to always spend time for yourself to reflect on what it really is that you desire in that potential person while dating. Fanning the flames before they turn into ashes, don't strike the match until you are ready to stand the heat.

For question and comments please email me at bludiamond@enterto.com

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Security Codes

Men just as well as women need to be safe when it comes to dating. Sure there was a bit of humor in it when looking for a date. going on a date, how to look on a date and how to act on a date. Which brings me to people taking on safety measures when it comes to dating. Recently, I viwed a television show in which it discussed the dangers of dating. More people should know about it if you don't already. If it has been spoken on, then it can't be stressed enough.

Don't except and offer for your date to buy you a drink. If you do, go to the bar with him.

Always watch your drink or take it with you when you have to excuse yourself.

Talk just about anything else other than your job, family and sex.

Ignore strong advances made toward you.

Never give out your personal information. (i.e. home address, job location) get his number instead.

Get away quickly if the advances toward you get completely out of hand and make you feel uncomfortable.

This is not for those who go out on dates together; it is also for those who go out alone and you are approached by someone. There are many ways to avoid the dangerous situations of dating. These are just a few. The main factor is if you are invited to go back to his place or follow him to his car (or her car) take precaution and DO NOT do it. Women or men can be dressed appropriately, but still have an agenda. You can still have fun dating, and still play it safe. If you are out with the girls; and guys if you are out with the fellows, always have a buddy system going if you are not sure about your surroundings.

The buddy system can truly save your life and protect your mind, body and spirit.

For comments and questions please email me at bludiamond@enterto.com

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Slow Your Role

There are perfect gentlemen and then there are perfect gentlemen. The perfect gentlemen will take you out to dinner, a movie and then expect something in return on the first night. These perfect gentlemen are the ones who have a certain look that says, "I bet I can tonight." In ways to show these perfect gentlemen that there will be nothing more than a kiss good night, you'll have to maintain a lady-like deposition by not flirting too much to give the perfect gentlemen the wrong impression. These perfect gentlemen are those that have looks to die for. But no other man would be jealous of. A few think that their looks alone can get them their first date.

The perfect gentlemen will go out of their way to show the young lady a very good time besides pulling out chairs and opening doors for you. A few of these men will not kiss on the first date. These are the ones that are usually second to none; the ones who are thought of as too perfect. So perfect that you'll think, "What is wrong with them?" There is absolutely nothing wrong with these type of men. A woman who hasn't been treated so well by the perfect gentlemen, will not know how to take on the other perfect gentlemen when they come along. But it can be fun picking out the bad apples just to get to the sweet ones. Be aware that the perfect gentlemen also have a few tricks up their sleeves to get your attention.

TRICKS:

They won't tell you how beautiful you are

During the date, they will not make eye contact (playing the shy role)

They will act nervous

To them, dorky is cool because that will be their way of attracting the opposite sex; so that's the way they act, but in a cute way

They will constantly open doors and pull out chairs for you even after the third date

Kiss on the hand good night

This will be a way to distinguish the perfect gentlemen from the perfect gentlemen. Which would you rather take home to meet your parents? We all have our own ways to catch a person's attention to get that first date just by having a conversation. We also have a tendency to act out what we think they want us to be. Play your part, but be yourself.

For questions and comments please email me at bludiamond@enterto.com

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Rubber band Man

There are six women to every man if he chooses to take that avenue to date those many women at the same time. How hard would it be to keep every name straight if you are dating that many people? There are also seven days in a week. You date the same girl three times a week, and the others the rest of the week. The secret to a man's success in dating those many women at the same time is keeping a straight face when he speaks directly to her unless he runs into a young lady who also knows the game that he's playing.

Well, maybe he's not playing and he's straight forward with the women he is seeing. A possible good quality in a man, but also dangerous. Honesty can get you what you want, but too much of it can cause a person to back track when there are feelings involved. What is meant by this is, don't volunteer information that is not asked for. That's the one mistake a few people make when out on a date. (too much information is given.) When a person's emotions get involved the repercussions of those feelings are not pretty. That's when a person is in love, can't handle rejection and don't know how to find a common ground in getting back to "self." To avoid this scene, try different things to distract you from getting too emotionally involved with a rubber band man.

(1) Think about what it was like before you met him. Ask yourself, what was my life like before meeting this man?

(2 )Find that inner calmness about yourself, stay focused on what you love doing.

(3) Learn the rules of the game and when a player line comes along by noticing the tone of voice that is being used.

(4) Don't analyze too much into what is being said as to how it is being said.

(5) The eyes tell all. The eyes are the mirror to the soul and they are easy to read.

(6) Give him a cute little nickname to keep in mind for yourself that it is only a meeting (if in fact that it's just the first date.)

(7) Look for the most common weak spot, don't use it against him but make him feel comfortable without letting on that you know what is going on.

(8) If you find yourself getting off track, repeat rule #2

(9) Surround yourself with loveliness

(10) On a date, don't go broke. Take money with you and pay your own way.

The last rule is to not let him only know that you are capable of taking care of yourself, but also giving you the freedom to be in control of the situation. If you run into a man who thinks you have the potential to rake out the cash on each date tell him that it was a very nice evening, and dismiss yourself. (Rule # 5 applies) When a man dates so many at once, information begins to overwhelm him, and he can't keep up with the ladies that he is taking out, this is a sign of weakness and showing that one woman has really gotten to him. The man with so many women can be stretched, and eventually, they will break.

For questions and comments please email me at bludiamond@enterto.com

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Dating 360

Let us say that you started dating at an age that you'd be able to understand the techniques of dating. First thing's first: to respect yourself and your date, bring the date home at a decent hour. With that rule, you are guaranteed a second date. Depending on where the date is going to take place, dress appropriately. As it has been stated before, hygiene is very important.

Women seem to always check themselves once over before opening the door or stepping out. That is a habit that nowadays the men also do. It is fun to see people out on dates. You actually can pick out who are on the date. Observe how they interact with each other. Do not talk about yourself the whole date. Give the person a chance to talk about what they love and their dislikes. Say something like, "I'm simple-I want to know about you." Things not to talk about would be (1) your job and boss (2) marriage and children (3) family.

Marriage is a touchy subject especially on the first date. This subject makes the person feel uncomfortable and all they want to do is enjoy the evening. They are not thinking ahead. They are just trying to see if you are the one they want to date or see again. It is bad enough that people have to contend with the rules of the day at work, listening to the boss and doing a job that most are not commended for. So no one else will want to hear about the woes of your job unless you really love what you do. So why bring it to the dating table? Family is right up there with marriage and children. We can understand that you have a love for yur family, but the date is about you and the person sitting at the table across from you. If you decide to take things further, then you can start talking about family.

What if they ask about those things? Keep your answers simple and to the point. But don't make it seem like you are being avasive and not wanting to talk to your date. Just as long as you both are having a decent conversation, the date should go well. These are just a few things to remember when you are out on a date. Be on your best behavior. And when all is complete, you would have reached your full circle of dating.

For questions and comments please email me at bludiamond@enterto.com

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Blowing Off Steam

This situation may require a bit of money. If you have given the date a chance to get to know you better and you are possibly on your fourth or fifth day, but just enjoying yourself with that person, it would be time to have more fun with the actual date and person. Without being too hands on, take you date to a spa.

You may think, "Okay, why would I spend that much money on someone who may not even appreciate what is being done?" Everyone has a rough day; this is a symbol of showing that you want the person you are "dating" to relax and enjoy a day of pampering depending on what time you get started. And what if you don't have that kind of money at that time? Improvise. Ask yourself, do I know this person well enough to do this for him or her? If you can't get that person out of your mind and you feel like this is the one, start saving if possible $10.00 every chance you receive to do so.

Ask that person how comfortable they would feel on receiving such a treatment by you at their place of residence, and fix it up in a way that it would feel and resemble spa. Candles, soft music of nature, scents of lavender, honey, vanilla, or jasmine. Lay out fruits that will delight the tongue. Make your guest as comfortable as they can possibly can be. This is for those who happen to be on a budget and can use their imagination to make the date worthwhile and memorable.

When the tub is filled with water, leave your date to their private time for at least 30 minutes; and proceed to get everything else set up while they relax or soak. If you are that romantic, but they don't want to go through with such a treatment, then make sure that you have prepared something special for them to dine on. Make it where it won't be overly romantic, but show that you do have a sense of humor. Depending on the night you set the date, Friday night would be good for pizza, chicken or fish.

This is not only good for just dates, it's also for couples who are married and desire to put excitement back in their marriage. So, on the nights you feel like relaxing with the one you really like. . .make it HOT!!!

For questions and comments please email me at bludiamond@entero.com

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John Tucker Universe

We have all run into a John Tucker in our lives, but didn't realize that until it was over. We have also run into a Jane Tucker as well. But there may be more John Tuckers than Jane's. Unless The Jane Tuckers took lessons. Dating comes naturally and it can be fun, but there are lines that are said to show the true identity of a John Tucker. Eventually the John and Jane Tuckers of the world have feelings too when they seem to have found the perfect one for them.

John Tuckers are just as beautiful as you are but they say things just to get a reaction and know how to work a crowd. "Without you I am nothing, but with you, you make my whole world come into existence." Those are wonderful words to hear from someone you like, or hearing how beautiful you are on the first night. Just make sure that you are sincere when you are saying those words. Maybe those words are good to say on the second and third date.

If you are dating, and dating different people at once, don't make the mistake of telling those people the same line. As a matter of fact, let the person know that you are "dating" strictly letting that person know that seeing other people is what you are doing now. You may even like something in each person you date. You might not even be ready for the relationship world; just don't hurt the other person's feelings. It is best to be friends if the other person agrees and that person is not the one you are really interested in. This would cut down on hard feelings and not wanting to speak to each other.

The John Tuckers of the universe are all around us, guard your heart and still treat the John Tuckers the way you desire to be treated, they have hearts too.

For questions and comments please email me at bludiamond@enterto.com

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Ink

Writing is a part of everyone's daily life and it becomes routine when you think about it. Even if you are not a writer, you are jotting down something. Be it a grocery list or a phone number. Now since the age of computers, no one is using paper to write letters. These days it's just a screen, a keyboard, and your fingers. So, what's missing? A pen. During the 16th, 17th and 18th century people used felt tip feathered pens, dipped the stencil in the ink, and wrote in a manner that was beautiful to the eyes.

They might have even written love letters to their special someone. A few might have been in secret. We receive mail everyday, but how often is it that we receive a written invitation to go out on a date? There aren't any special notes or letters through the mail or back then by carriage to delivery such wonderful pieces of mail. In this day and time people meet each other in passing, talk and exchange phone numbers. Then by phone set a date or a "meeting." If a person desires to show true romance and make a good first impression, after meeting send a note. . .hmmm hold up! Forgot something. What if no address was given? This would be an excuse to call back and get the address. But just in case cards were given out, it's likely that the address is on the card.

Wait a day or two before doing anything even calling. And surprise the person that you have met with a written invitation to join you for dinner. When, where and attire. The person that receives this invitation will think this is quite odd, but sweet and something new. This will make the evening more interesting. It will end up to be more of a scavenger hunt if you take that route. Set it up with restaurant you will be dinning, to place little notes and what knots at your reserved table. Then take a look at the expression on your date's face as you walk her to that reserve setting. This is just first time of the night of a second meeting so the third time around, you might have the freedom to leave more special notes for that person you are interested in.

Invest your time wisely

Never giving up on what you

know.

For questions and comments email me please at bludiamond@enterto.com

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U.P.S. (Under Pressure Syndrome)

Like the postal service, every person seems to be in a hurry about something one way or another. The postal service has to delivery in a timely fashion. It may be the same with dating. With dating, there is a time, the packaging has to look good in order for it to be kept, if you don't like what's inside, the package can always be sent back.

One the job, a person has to do things correctly or they will get fired. First dates are always stressful. If something isn't done correctly or to that person's liking, you won't be seen again. You have time to get yourself together for the date, check yourself over twice and walk out of the door. By the time you get to the car, you once again check yourself to see if you look okay. There is a dress code at work so, don't you feel obligated to look your best on a date? You do not have to go all out and wear a shirt and tie unless it's a black tie event. Wear something casual and clean.

Is your hair in place, your teeth clean, breath fresh? These are the things that a few people have on their minds when going out. You concentrate so much on what you look like that you just don't get the opportunity to enjoy your date. On the job, you concentrate on doing the job in such a perfect fashion that you forget that it could be a job that you really can enjoy. We all look at the shoes we have on a person's feet. From head to toe, you must be clean or the job is lost or the date is gone.

There was a statement made which said that you can tell a lot about a person by the shoes that he wears. Are your shoes clean? Meaning, you have to be prepared on what to expect on a date. It may go well or it may not go well. The person you are with may not feel the same electricity you do if you are into that person. There is nothing wrong with a bad date. You learn by doing and observing.

There is no need to stress about what the other person is thinking about you on a date or pressured to have that date if you don't want to go. You may just be missing out on the delivery of a lifetime.

For questions and comments please email me at bludiamond@enterto.com

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Wonder Woman/Batman

Diana Prince and Bruce Wayne. . .both outstanding heroes of our time for fighting crime and wanting justice for their fellow man. Alright, so what am I getting at here? Wonder Woman lived on an Amazon island where they were the dominant ones, the men were captured and put to work as their slaves. Bruce Wayne a crime fighting detective who became that way because of the death of his parents. He conquered his fear of bats which most people fear and so criminals would fear him.

Throughout our days and night we find that we run into some bad apples while dating. We are all not Wonder women or Batmen, but we all like to pretend to be. Bruce Wayne is intelligent, handsome, well rounded and wealthy. All men are not like that but I'm sure we can find a Batman in every man we come across. It's called being nice and having a decent personality. He may even snoop every once in a while and try to figure out what's wrong and do his best to solve the problem that is going on at the time.

Wonder woman has the strength of 10 men and the beauty to back that up. Women are strong, independent and courageous. There times when we will need a man's help and there is nothing wrong with that. We like a man to open the door for us and pull out our chairs, but also give us that freedom to be independent. Some women might return the favor as to opening the door for you or pulling out chairs. So you can say, we do have our own island that we tend to daily in keeping our men happy and satisfied.

On a date, a Bruce Wayne can come out and pull out a chair and open doors for you. If a man stumbles on a date, falls at your feet, don't laugh. . .extend your hand, be that Wonder Woman and help him up and then laugh together. Bruce Wayne's of the world don't try and find out everything about a woman on the date, leave a little mystery to be desired for the next time around. That is if the first time was fun. Diana Prince's of the universe, don't always show your strength the very first time. Even Wonder Woman had her weakness. Don't always think that every man is the same because they are not.

Whatever your tragedy may have been in your life growing up, there is always someone that has been through worse things. These will be the people you run into, date and will show you through actions that they can be strong individuals, smile and continue to be happy with being a part of your life even if it is just for that moment. With strength, beauty, bronze, smarts and courage, it's good to work as a team.

For questions and comments email me at bludiamond@enterto.com

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Clean Slate

You have been together for months to a year to more months to added extra years and then. . .there are pieces to pick up and you are back into the dating game. Depending on your age bracket, we all do things differently. Women and Men in their 20's may find it easy to date, find that someone special and spend that quality time with each other. If a break up happens, they can easily get back into the game.

Women and men in their 30's may have their life together (if not married), successful, enjoying their lives and just meeting other people. They won't be forced to get into anything too serious unless they really want to be. Think about it this way: What is dating? Dating is when a person can choose who he or she wants to go out with and it is not exclusive. He or she can go out with one person one night and another person the next night and a third person the next night. I read someone say that going out once is not a date. Then how about people change the name of going out the very first time to "meet up"? If the two like each other, and make plans to go out the second time, then you can call it a date.

Women and men in their 40's are pretty much set in their ways in how they wan to date or see people. They are free to see whom they want because they are experienced in what they want. People in their 40's may find it hard to date. At that age, a percentage of men are looking at the younger generation to date. Not only that, but also they seem to like women who fit the bill of the model type. Granted, us big girls do have some advantage where there are men who do love the bigger version of the model type. (i.e. long hair, light skinned, petite.) We all gain weight. Women are a bit different. We love you because we see something in you (men) that other people don't or can't see or you can't see in yourselves.

Here is the real deal. There is nothing like a 50 year old man or woman; especially if you keep yourselves looking and feeling good where people try to guess your age. That's a very good feeling isn't it? Now! When you are at that age and there is no one around to keep you company, and you desire to date, how do you go about picking up the pieces to start dating again? That's only if you want to, get yourself together by treating yourself first to a spa, exercise, dye your hair, whiten your teeth, purchase a new outfit and take yourself to dinner. Of course, unless you have the money, you can't do that all in one day. I'm not saying that the other age brackets can't do the same. That 50 age bracket, probably doesn't have that much time on their hands to think about pampering themselves. Plus you have to be bold enough to make that change and start over.

With all ages, and you are getting out of a relationship, you must maintain a certain kind of inner peace to move on from what may have been a bad relationship after dating for so long. It truly is scary to pick up the pieces and start dating again. For some, just think of what you were doing with your life and your world before you started dating. Get back to self, get back to life and enjoy you, and when that is done, other people will see things in you that you do not see in yourself. That is when you truly know that you have made a clean break from the old you. Your plate is no longer full or dirty.

For questions and comments please email me at bludiamond@enterto.com

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Pop Goes The Weasel

Dating can be fun if you let it be. It is all about the thrill of the chase or playing hard to get when it comes getting what a person wants. Not all things beautiful are meant to be chased. But as I stated earlier, It the fun of chasing. Some men and women like to play games. These games usually lead to heartbreak and anger within the man or the woman. You have men and women who are straight forward with what they desire and then they run across the wrong one who wants more than just fun and games.

Why did the money chase the weasel? He could have been bored or the fact that monkeys actually do chase weasels. Even though in this situation, the monkey talks and says to the weasel "It was all in fun." Now a person can take this next line any way they want to. It could mean that the weasel became angry because the monkey said that it was all in fun and the weasel did not want to be chased. With that in mind, this could mean that the person being chased has other things on their mind other than being chased or that person is interested in someone else.

A spool of thread and a needle can symbolize being roped into the game without realizing that your are in the game. And the results are very painful when you find out that you have just been played. Just be nice, smile, say that you enjoyed your time with that person, and hope that they have a good life and find what they are looking for.

When the night ends there will be no time to even beg for a kiss because you probably don't want that kiss. But just think, the kiss might be the sweetest thing you ever received from someone you will never see again.

For questions and comments email me at bludiamond@enterto.com

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Escapade

Who says a date has to be expensive? With gas prices fluctuating and job loss is at an all time high, there are other ways to plan a date and make it fun. For those of us that do not have the funds to go on a big date consider the alternatives. Cooking dinner for your date, go to the park, watch movies that you already have; chances are your date hasn't seen it. Now, a few of these do require a small amount of money. You do have to pay for food to cook and going to the park does take gas.

The parties should each have a few dollars in their pockets just in case the date doesn't go well because one or two things could happen. (1) The date doesn't go well (2) if the date doesn't go well you may be in an area where your cell phone doesn't work to call a cab. Always make sure you have money for a cab if you do not have other transportation. No one wants to be stuck on a date and things do not go well and you get left by your date without him or her taking you home.

There are four seasons in the year. Winter, spring, summer and fall. Depending on how well you know your date these may be a few things to try. When this was thought of, it felt like a good idea to do. Say that you are living in New York, go ice skating in the winter time at the Rockefeller ice rink. That may cost a few dollars and then again it may not. Bundle up. That would be the most romantic time of the year. Make sure that you do not stay out too long because that is cold season and if the date goes well and if you want to see your date again, you won't be able to do that if your date is sick. Then again, if your date becomes sick, bring him or her soup or something warm to eat. That will be a god idea to see and spend time with him or her.

Spring is allergy season. This is the time that walks are granted. That too is a colorful season. It's also a rainy season as well. Some people love the rain, so if you feel like you won't melt, take a walk in the rain for those who are bold enough. This is also another season that you can spend indoors watching movies, eating popcorn and cuddling.

Summer time is so simple. What do we think of when we think summer? We think kids outside playing, wearing shorts and the girls in halter tops. When we think summer, we think the beach or your favorite swimming whole. Also family reunions with a lot of food, fun and games. Not only that, more walks in the park.

Fall is another time where you can be care free and do all of that from the other seasons. That will also be a very good time to just gas up the car and take a ride through the countryside and say that is the longest date every taken. Lastly, break all the rules if you're not having fun. That will be your time to get away

For questions and comments please email me at bludiamond@enterto.com.

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Call On Me (Give Me Some Breathing Room)

That first initial meeting is the most wonderful feeling a person can ever have when starting to date again. The best part about it is if you two mesh well. So what happens the night after? Okay, there is a kiss good night-that is a start. The next day, there is a phone call. A better start. That really lets a person know that he or she is into you. You have a decent conversation by phone and things go well. Then you say good bye.

Ten or 15 minutes later, the phone rings again, it is the same person you went out on a date with, and you are thinking "what is it now? I just finished speaking with this person." That person may say that he or she has forgotten to tell you something. This is fine and you think that it is sweet that the person was kind enough to call back and say what it is that was on his or her mind. So you sit and talk a bit more and an hour or so goes by and what you had planned to do for the day has slipped by you.

After you get things half way done, your telephone rings again. Third time is the charm. It is now evident that this person is sincere about his or her feelings toward you, and you are continuing to enjoy the conversation. You plan to meet again during the day for brunch or coffee. That person is all elated to be invited out for the day, just to be able to spend some time with you. Before you step out of your door the phone rings again!

If a person calls you more than twice a day and that person IS NOT married to you, take a look at the yellow light (Proceed with caution). You are not in it to hurt anyone's feelings. This is only showing you that this person cares but yet you don't want to feel smothered. Ask him or her to give you time to call them. That person seems real nice and you really want to get to know him or her. Don't make any excuses; politely say "Let me call you." That will show the other person that you are interested in them, and then being around them won't be so difficult.

Make sure that they understand that their time is valuable to you and your time is valuable to you also. Then the person you are dating will be given the attention he or she deserves. This way it won't make them feel as if they are posted waiting on standby, looking to catch that red eye.

For questions and comments email me at bludiamond@enterto.com

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Eyenetics

Beauty is in the eye of the Beholder so why is it that looks have to matter when dating someone of the opposite sex? It shows that one can be attracted to the other person in knowing that they don't have to be an eye sore when they meet and the company that is being kept will enjoy being around that person. Let us take a "look" at a few scenarios that may seem out of the ordinary when dating a person or even if you have been on a few dates.

Say that you have gone on a few dates with a person that you are very interested in and then all of a sudden he or she gets a few drinks in them. By the sixth round of a drink, whomever you are with will look at you in a different way as in saying you are the most beautiful creature that he or she has ever encountered. People call that being "full"; in layman's term, you have had too much to drink. Everything is beautiful to that person when drinking. The brain does crazy things when you have had alcohol in your system. The next day is a killer, you get numbers, call that person, meet up and when you see that person, you look at them thinking "this is not who I met last night." You burry the hatchet and try to make it through the evening in which you called upon the company that you kept.

There are people in the world that do look on the inside of a person and see the heart, whereas others look at the outside first to see how good a person looks which in turn gives them the false reality that this person is good al the way around. And they could be and receive the full package of a good hearted and the added plus of looking good. It's always been said that or told that dating someone of the "lesser kind" will make the other person look good. But the lesser kind will be the one with the good heart, and good personality which brings out the beauty in the person.

People who have no vision use touch to reveal how beautiful the other person is. But if they sit down and get to know the person's heart, it would be a very different story. Unlike the people who have a good time in getting "full", a person with no sight can't get it back, and they rely on their intincts about a person. How should a person react when they see someone for the first time and they are not to their liking? If you have a good heart, continue with the date. if the date goes well and you can get passed the looks, it's up to you to want to see that person again, and have the beauty in their eyes show through you. Class dismissed

For comments and questions email me at bludiamond@enterto.com

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When Something Is Said

So you made it through the third or fourth date and things seemed to be going well between the two of you, and then one day, no phone call. Don't panic-it's just a formality. The days go bad and you begin to wonder why there has not been a phone call or even an email. When you finally get in touch with the person to find out why there wasn't a phone call, there may be a bit of a hesitation on either part. When you ask a question, make sure you are ready for the answer.

"I feel that I am not the right person for you." What is that actually saying? Point blank, that person is not interested in getting to know you any further or they may feel they are simply not ready to get into anything serious at that moment and just want to do a lot of mingling. Instead of beating around the bush, honesty is the best policy. But make sure also that you are dealing with someone who can handle rejection. Okay, many people can't handle rejection when they are into someone that they want to see again.

"I've been working late." Same as the first-that person is simply not into you. He or she is into someone else. In some cases, that person may be working late. It's all about knowing how to read that person. Sometimes that is hard to do. If you're just hearing it; it's the tone of voice being used and the speed to how it's being said. Eyes are the mirror to the soul so if you are looking that person in the face when he or she says "I've been working late." follow the eyes.

"My car needs work." Hmmm, a very difficult one to analyze because anyone can have car trouble, but if this is happening too many times when they ask for a rain check, that only means that they have something else going on and all they are doing is playing games.

These are just a few sayings that you might start to hear after the dating period is over. And if you don't see much of each other when you start to date, that's also evidence that you'll be wasting your valuable you have that could be spent worthwhile with someone else. As someone said a very long time ago, "Talk is cheap." Speak up.

For comments and questions, please email me at bludiamond@enterto.com

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Icecream Castles

America's second favorite dessert is ice cream-in my opinion. Just like speed dating, you'll be introduced to many different types of men. Caucasian, African American, Asian, Mexican, Latinos, and a mixed variety of cultures in one body. Follow me: Vanilla, Chocolate, Black Walnut, Butter Pecan, and Nepoeoan.

Remember your first taaste of ice cream? You could have been 10, and that first bite sent a shock to your spine and you probably felt that that was the best thing you ever tasted? Same way with dating. When you feel like you met up with that perfect person in your eyes, things begin to "taste" differently. So you've had a few bitter tasting ice cream cones, or ice cream in a bowl or cup. That will not stop you from loving ice cream in general. You just move on to a different flavor. There is this ice cream parlor called Kaleidoscoop, and it really is a scope of many mixtures of ice cream under the sun. Remember the scope that you looked through to see a full range of colors as a kid? That's what this ice cream parlor represents. There is even a flavor caled "Trash."

"Trash" could be a man (or woman) who dresses not to impress you and it doesn't look good to the eye BUT it's good on the inside. This type you could easily fix up if you two have things in common and that's the fun part about it. "Trash" may be fixed up in a way that if you didn't like the look, you are allowed to rearrange it so that you can enjoy the aftertaste and it's not at all bitter. But if you change "Trash" just to make it look good to you, it will then be called a "Klondite" . Since the fix up, you would do anything for this Klondite because it is yours to enjoy.

So whatever your flavor of ice cream might be in dating whether it be Vanilla, Chocolate, Butter Pecan, or Nepoleon, you have a right to enjoy your ice cream castles in the summertime and still be treated like a prince or a princess.

For comments and questions email me at bludiamond@enterto.com

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Taken For A Ride

You've heard that expression "Men are like buses?" One comes along every hour. Well, buses can be slow and late. Ask yourself this question, What kind of car do I like? Then once you figure out what type of car you like then you know what man you are looking for to date. For example: If you like BMW's, it may mean that the man you are searching for is well dressed, articulate, good looking and may have a bit of money. First dates are always fun with these kind of men. They talk about themselves and their job. Don't expect much from this man because they are married to their jobs. Nowadays, BMW's are easy to purchase by anyone.

If you Rolls Royce that means you could possibly like the higher powered men. They too are married to their jobs and think highly of you when they are with you. The dates however do not last for hours and hours. But during the night, you'll be treated like royalty.

Mercedes Benz is a different breed. These type of men take their time with everything. These men will even like to cook. So, your first date will be that the man will cook for you. Isn't that wonderful? They also probably be more romantic and take you on picnics.

Ferraris are fast and good looking. These type of men are only concerned about what looks good and how they look. First dates with these guys will be long because all they would do is look in the mirror. Yes, they are good to look at. Even though every car won't be listed, this is giving you a look at how men can react to certain things and if you are willing to spend time on first dates wit that person.

My favorite. . .Mazda. it has the quality of the other cars listed in men form, yet when you are ready to have fun, they are there ready and waiting.

BUT we can't forget about the biggest ride of all rides and that is the train. A train is fair, easy, smooth, faster than ther average car, can carry a heavy load, and when you get tired, they slow down.

For questions or comments email me at bludiamond@enterto.com

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Weighing Your Options

So your date walks up to your door and rings your doorbell; you open and to your surprise when you open the door you get the shock of your life about your blind date. You notice that your blind date is a bit on the heavy side. You graciously give a smile, grab him or her by the hand and say hello. On the way out to eat, the conversation is delightful and you two seem to be hitting it off perfectly. You make it to your favorite restaurant and your date is the perfect gentleman by opening the door for you and intertwining your arm with his.

Once inside the restaurant, you notice that people are staring and it makes you a bit uncomfortable. You do your best not to let your date know that you have all of a sudden become uncomfortable with the looks. After being seated, the order is taken and you continue to enjoy the company that you are keeping, you both notice people at the other tables staring in your direction, what do you do?

(a) politely ask if your date desires to go some place else?

(b) stay and continue to enjoy the night?

Let us switch it up a bit. How about all three?! Some people will get an attitude for staring and usually end up saying something to the other people. This in itself has such a liberating feeling, but if you do this, do this in a manner in which is intelligent at best. That's ONLY if you continue to get stares throughout the evening. Politely ask your date if he or she feels more comfortable going some place else. If your date declines this offer and says that he or she still wants to stick it out where you are and that person feels uncomfortable, that person is showing you how brave he or she is.

In light of the situation that you are being watched by others, without pretending, show the couple at the next table how good of a time that you are having with your date. You have to eat too. if you continue to get stares, kindly excuse yourself from your table (which I know is horrible dating etiquette), and politely walk over to the couple and kindly ask them not to stare because it is making you and your date feel uncomfortable and all you are trying to do is enjoy your evening. Okay, you're thinking, what if that doesn't work? Take a deep breath because it's going to get harder. Keep in mind people are rude when it comes to other people being "different" than they are. You rarely see people get loud just because of how a person looks; at that point the manager of the restaurant should step in and interject and calm the situation.

Smile and walk by to your date knowing that you tried to rectify the situation. By this time, your date will probably ask you if you want to leave and you'll say that you came here to eat and enjoy yourself with your date. You must know in your heart that you can still have a good time with that person no matter what size that person is because the people at the next table could have something wrong with them, and they not even know it. And hope for a second date. Your date will look at you as doing such a corageuos thing on your first date; knowing that you really didn't have to. But make sure that your date knows that you are not embarrassed by being with him or her. You just want that person to have a good time.

We don't live to eat-we eat to live. Enjoy what tastes good

For questions and comments email me at bludiamond@enterto.com

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Fishing For a Date

There are over a billion dating sites that people can go to (for a price) to find their one true love. Think about this: even with those dating sites you go through many people to get to that one true love. Ask yourself this question, is it or will it be worth the money? Many people spend hours online looking for that perfect someone. There is no one perfect person. When you first meet, it's all about making that first impression. Why is it so imporatant to make a first impression? The reason: to get the second date.

And once you get the second date, you will still be trying to feel that person out to see if that person is worth your time. There are other means of finding a date. People don't want to do it but it's called that old fashioned way of doing things. You read in other places the best places to meet people. (i.e. the grocery store, convenient store or the laundry mat) Let us look at the more likely places to meet considering the size. Let us start with the church. People know that church is for one purpose only, and it's not to find a date. But in bigger area churches there are many singles there. It's all in a manner of approaching the person you are attracted to.

You know how when you go fishing, there are things you need to prepare to catch the fish?

A fishing rod= the state of mind you'll have approaching that person

the line to the fishing rod= what will be said when you approach that person

the bait= what you will use to get their attention (i.e. roses, a bottle of wine, candy)

Bug spray= an excuse to leave if the date isn't going as well as expected.

There is also the fun open dates of speed dating. That is the second easiest and exciting way to meet so many men and women in one night. And the rules are as such: you have three to five minutes to get to "know" the person you're talking to while taking notes. Wouldn't that be a bit distracting and time consuming if you're trying to get to know someone? And then at the end of the evening the people over it, tally up the scores on each card to see who matches with who. I'm not downing speed dating. It is a very interesting concept in dating. What if the person that matches you, you do not like or vice versa? It's your choice to make to either say no or give it a chance to see if there will be a need for a first date.

The Gym could possibly be another way of meeting people. If a person sees that you are making an effort to take care of yourself, that is a plus. People love people who look good. Introduce yourself in a manner that will lead up to the question, Can we work out together sometime? And if there is a smile and a common interest, there will be no need to throw the fish back into the water. And if that doesn't work, you can always try another fishing whole.

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On Your Way Out

"Sorry I'm so late." Have you ever heard these words before when you are excited to meet someone for the first time? It's called a date. When this happens, the person waiting will continue to think throughout the date this person was late. But then you try to do your best to give that person the benefit of the doubt. Okay, let us start from the very beginning. . .

Getting the number. . .Where did you meet? What was your first impression? Don't panic! If you got passed the two questions, take a breather and relax. Obviously, you liked the person who approached you. We've all heard it before- meet in a public place, or first meet for cofee. Once you do that, find out as much as you possibly can without being too talkative. If that person says something to you amusing or you think that is amusing, laugh. As it has been said and not stressed enough, relax and enjoy the evening.

But if you find that one that has you waiting at the meeting place say 10 minutes, leave. Ten minutes is entirely too long to wait for someone to show up for a date. For this reason if you wait any longer and that person does show up, it's likely that you won't be able to enjoy yourself because the whole time you'll be thinking, "Why was this person late? Why did he/she take so long? Did he or she not really want to see me? There could be several reasons for that person not showing up at the time requested. The fear of being rejected, car broke down, or wanted to change clothes.

These are all good and decent reasons for the tardiness. So if you are prepared to hear the answer-ask. But if you are willing not to know, don't ask. The dating game is a difficult one to tackle, but in most cases, you have to treat it like a chess game. Know when to make your move, how to make your move, and when the move is made, make sure it's the right move.

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